After cremation, it's common for the immediate family members of the deceased to either keep the remains or scatter them at a group ceremony. If these ideas aren't exactly appealing to you, there are other options for you to consider. One less-common idea, but one that might suit you well, is to keep a portion of the remains (perhaps giving the rest to your other family members) and divide them into a series of small pouches or keepsake urns. The premise of this idea is that you'd keep the remains for a while, and then scatter them at different times that are important. Here are some examples of these times.

On An Anniversary 

There are all sorts of anniversary dates on which you could feel compelled to scatter one of your pouches of cremated remains. If you're dealing with the loss of a parent, the parent's birthday or retirement date are obvious choices, but it can be nice to get more creative. For example, if you were adopted, you might want to scatter some of the remains on the date that you and your birth mother were reacquainted, perhaps several decades after adoption.

After Some Therapy

Not everyone has a good relationship with his or her parents, and it's possible that your parent could pass away without you ever resolving your differences. This can leave you with a burden, but one that you can help with therapy. Several therapy sessions can have you feeling better about the issues that were once between you, and you might feel ready to start remembering your parent in a fresh, new way. You can then choose to scatter another pouch of the remains to symbolize this new beginning.

Spontaneously

If you're someone who values being spontaneous, you may think about keeping a small portion of the remains with you — perhaps storing them in your purse or jacket pocket, for example. You might sometimes find yourself in a special area and really thinking a lot about your departed loved one. Maybe you're recalling fond memories that you had together, or maybe you're just really missing him or her. If you already have a portion of the remains with you, you can be spontaneous and scatter the remains right then and there. Even if your family members have other ideas about how they want to handle the cremated remains, remember that you're entitled to do what feels right for you. If the above idea is suitable, voice your preference to your family.

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